Thursday, December 11, 2008

One Year Later, by Danielle LaVerde

One Year Later …

Today marks the one year anniversary of the diagnosis that nearly destroyed me. I remember that day so clearly. I was absolutely distraught. I remember not being able to breathe. I felt as though I was suffocating. I remember how badly my heart hurt and how heavy it felt. I remember feeling very empty and alone. And I remember wanting to die. The reality of Niemann-Pick Type C hit me like a ton of bricks, knocking the wind right out of me.

Even though the diagnostic process was exhausting, I always felt that we would eventually find the answer and there would be a magic pill that would make her better. I just knew that God would not allow the anguish to continue. So when the diagnosis was confirmed, I was so angry.

I spent months asking “why”. Why my child? Why a disease so devastating? Why were we being punished? I thought no one could understand my pain. It was completely overwhelming. I received a death sentence for the most important thing in my world - - my precious daughter. I had worked so hard and waited so long for her. And now I was going to lose her before she even had a chance to live. Every time I looked at her I felt anger and pain.

Gabrielle’s school, Deltona Lakes Elementary,

I began to look at Gabrielle and think, “I am so blessed to have this special child. Of all the women in the world, I was chosen to be her mother. God knew I would fight for her.”

Those who have helped us carry the weight of this pain have created

While her future is still uncertain, we now have hope. She is everything to me and I will never stop fighting for her. Gabrielle was a miracle once before, and thanks to the strength and support of her Guardian Angels, she has a chance to be a miracle again.

“When we cannot trace God’s hand, we must simply trust His heart."
~ Charles Spurgeon

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Hi Gabrielle! I read your article in Enquirer today. You're such an amazing, beautiful little girl. I used to live in Deltona, Fl too and my family still lives there.

My cousin Adam also has Niemann-Pick Type C. He is 9 years old and he's from PA. His website is www.raceforadam.com

- Amanda "Laney" McDonald

julie88 said...

CMC Insights, a marketing research firm, is conducting market research in the field of Niemann-Pick C disease. We are interested in speaking with primary caregivers (for example, parents or guardians) for people with NP-C in order to understand the overall diagnosis process, sources of information, and challenges faced by families and patients. Participating caregivers will be asked to be available for a 45 minute to 60 minute telephone discussion with our principal (using a toll-free call-in number). In return for participating, a donation will be made to NNPDF. You can reach me at 1888-620-2301 and look us up on our website at www.petersmktg.com
Thanks so much in advance,
Julie

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